What Not to Do When Dating a Chinese Girl

When dating a Chinese girl, it is important to remember that she will be heavily influenced by her family. Most of her ancestors and parents still place great importance on marriage.

Love in China is usually a much more lengthy process than in Western countries. During this time, you should try to learn to listen and not just talk.

1. Be too smart

A Chinese woman isn’t your typical girl. She may not look like one of those slender models in magazines, or she may not be good at cooking. But she does have a strong sense of independence and a unique perspective on dating.

For instance, she is more likely to value career success and wealth over physical attraction. She also tends to be more introverted than most. But don’t worry, she will open up to you over time.

She is more likely to appreciate you if you are a bit of a gentleman. Playfully throw in some naughty remarks to leave her wondering about you. This can help build a more chemistry between you. But be careful, too much naughtiness could backfire. The last thing you want is her parents to think you’re a bad influence on their daughter.

2. Be too naughty

Chinese women have grown up in a society that promotes sex with men as a form of status. This has ingrained in them the notion that they need to be swooned over by their boyfriends, and they can sometimes feel jealous or demanding if they don’t get enough attention from their guys.

In a relationship, a foreigner might be tempted to make comments about her appearance or try to show off his physical prowess in front of his Chinese girlfriend. This would be extremely inappropriate and could potentially offend her. It is considered a serious loss of face in China to lose one’s reputation or social standing due to being involved with a “bad boy.”

In addition, Chinese girls expect their boyfriends to pay for all meals when they go out. They are generally not comfortable with public displays of affection.

3. Be too aggressive

Despite their jovial and humorous demeanor, Chinese women are a serious bunch. They have a robust work ethic and are extremely devoted companions. As such, it’s important to treat them seriously in the early stages of a relationship.

Dating a Chinese girl is a unique experience that shouldn’t be taken lightly. She takes dating much more seriously than her western counterparts and uses every date to gauge whether she can see a future with the guy she’s with.

For this reason, it’s best to refrain from making big moves or using cheesy pick-up lines. She’ll appreciate your humility and respect for her culture more than the juvenile bluster that most men think they need to impress a woman. In addition, be sure to listen attentively. She’ll tell you when she wants to talk. She’ll also let you know if she’s not interested in a particular topic.

4. Be too cocky

Chinese girls are often criticized for being cocky and headstrong. While these are qualities that can be beneficial in a relationship, it’s important not to take them too far. Being too cocky can come across as arrogant or condescending, and it may cause her to lose face.

In Chinese culture, face is something that’s very important. This is because a person’s reputation and their social standing are very much linked to this concept. They will always want to keep their face intact, so they’ll avoid doing anything that might hurt their image.

For this reason, it’s best not to flaunt your status or accomplishments in front of a Chinese woman. This will give her the impression that you aren’t serious about your relationship. It will also make her question your commitment and her future with you.

5. Be too talkative

Chinese girls are often a little awkward around PDA and are not as comfortable with it as their Western counterparts. This doesn’t mean they don’t like expressing their feelings but it is something to keep in mind when dating a Chinese girl. Also, be careful not to get too into talking about your work as she may find this a bit boring and one-sided.

Lastly, be sure not to use cheesy pick-up lines or try to impress her with big moves such as taking her out for dinner and a movie. She will have heard it all before and this can come off as juvenile bluster. Instead, create a more relaxed atmosphere such as meeting up for coffee. This will help you to build trust and also give her the opportunity to talk about herself more.

6. Be too ambitious

Most Chinese women take their dating much more seriously than what is popularly believed to be the case in Western culture. This is because for them, it is a stepping stone to marriage.

Therefore, if you are not serious about pursuing her, she will be able to sense that and be clear with you right from the start. She would rather not waste her time on someone who does not have a clear and genuine intention in mind.

It is also important to remember that Chinese people are very family-oriented. Therefore, her family’s opinion about you will play a major role in your relationship with her. This is why it’s always best to keep your social circle separate. This way, you can avoid gossiping about her to other colleagues and friends until your relationship with her has been firmly established.

7. Be too egotistical

Despite the fact that Chinese women are becoming more modern and are less traditional, marriage is still a major consideration in their lives. Even though she might tell you that dating is just for fun, she will always have the idea in the back of her mind that her parents might think otherwise.

Therefore, she will not want to show public displays of affection like hugging and kissing in the street. She also might not be comfortable with you paying for her whole meal or splitting the bill at a restaurant. Instead, try to be more humble by trying things like meeting up for coffee without the big set up and expectations of going to a movie or dinner. This will give her the impression that you are not egotistical and that you respect her and her family.

8. Be too materialistic

Chinese girls are very traditional and conservative, especially when it comes to dating. They take it very seriously and gauge whether they can spend their lives with a guy right from the beginning. They will also ask how much money you make early on so they know if you are rich enough for them.

Don’t try to impress her with cheesy pick-up lines or big moves. Instead, meet her for a casual date like coffee or dinner and keep it light so she can relax with you. Also, don’t talk about your past relationships or other women — she doesn’t want to hear it. Listening is very important in China and it can help you build a strong relationship with her. This is because she will trust you more when you show her that you respect her.

9. Be too naive

Chinese girls can tell when you are trying too hard to impress them with the traditional dating moves. This usually just makes them think that you are an arrogant guy who wants to show off in front of her friends. Instead, try throwing subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) hints her way and listen to her.

Chinese women take dating much more seriously and often judge whether or not they can see themselves spending the rest of their lives with you. They also tend to choose men who are financially stable and can provide for them in the long run. In addition, they often expect their boyfriends to pay for dinner and other dates. If you are naive, she will easily pick up on it and might end the relationship. So be careful and be mature.

10. Be too egotistical

If you’re dating a Chinese girl who still lives with her parents, it’s important to understand that they may put a lot of pressure on her to get married. This is because they want her to have a stable career and comfortable lifestyle.

Showing too much affection in public is also frowned upon. This means you shouldn’t hug her or kiss her in front of other people. Instead, save the public displays of affection for when you’re alone with her.

Lastly, don’t argue with her about politics or religion. These topics are taboo in China and will likely make her feel offended. Instead, keep the conversation light and fun. This will help you build a strong foundation for your relationship.